Today makes exactly a week you left us mama. Even till date when I see any woman wearing a long ankara gown I am tempted to tell the next person that, “that woman looks like mum”, that’s before looking properly and realizing she ain’t you.
I wish I planned for this day, you know maybe if you were ill it might not hurt so much because I’d be by your side all through but no death snatched you away from us unexpectedly. No sickness! Nothing! In less than 3 minutes you were gone. Ouch!! Will this pain ever go away??
The moment I received the news of your ascendance, Nne, my world caved in. My heart was torn into two, one was filled with heartache and pain, the other died with you. Sleep eluded me. I lie awake at nights when the world is fast asleep, through the stillness of the dark; alone I take a walk down memory lane with tear filled eyes.
Certainly, death is inevitable! Every living soul has its death coupon already issued depending on when, where and how. But it is most certain that we will all embark on that eternal journey someday. In spite of this, we still grieve when we lose our beloved ones, particularly, our parents.
Indeed, the sorrow of losing parents, especially a mother, is to the extreme and an emotionally severe one.
Ah, ezigbo Nne m, the ever smiling and generous mama Ada. She would greet both old and young with her loud and clear voice. Always forcing me to greet just like her, Ikene go ya (Have you greeted?) Gush, sometimes I’d be so angered with all the plenty plenty greetings. But when I hear people talk about your greeting lifestyle upon your demise it gladdens my heart. Kai, mum you were a good woman, very very good woman. If you could take the world under your roof, you would have. Scarcity wasn’t an excuse to your giving attitude, very friendly, God lover, always teasing everyone, your sincere advice and kind words soothed all troubled souls around you, your profound belief that God in heaven watches over our actions.
Who didn’t like mama Ada after a first meeting with her. Who?
You’d always say, Adaeze take care of yourself, stop sending money home but how can I when you (the generous queen) birthed me? You stopped me from washing stove because you didn’t want me to cut myself so my future husband won’t say ‘oh she doesn’t have a finger’. It hurts on a different level that the Omugwo we joked about you didn’t get to do it. To think I just told you about ‘him’ and sent ‘him’ to you on that fateful day 😭😭😭😭 I’d always tell you that you will stay with me for a year once I gave birth, Kai, death you are wicked!. 😭😭😭😭
I am just wondering where else we can get the heartfelt love and care you lavished on us? Anyway, we take solace in the fact that you lived a good life. A life that we are all proud of.
Nne, you’ve been the source of my progress, cheerfulness, courage, and a strong pillar upon which I rest. You taught me to be generous, God fearing, strong and everything I am today.
Tears drift down my face as I’m writing this piece with my heart fiery from the innermost, telling me that, from now on, I will spend the rest of my life here on earth without my loving, caring, and encouraging mother. It’s really an irreparable loss which has created a vacuum that cannot be filled.
If I could write a story about you, dear mother, it would be the greatest ever told of a kind and warm heart, a loving and caring mother who had a generous heart of gold. Diction fails in providing the right words that would correctly describe your sterling qualities. The images fill my head but my education could not arm me with words to say how you are.
If I could write a story about your life struggles, the needless troubles and battles you went through in defence of your children and your husband and a huge heart full of sunshine with which you tolerated and forgave, a million pages would not be enough to tell the story of how simple a heart you were.
You were the most precious and most beautiful. You gave me and my 5 younger brothers life, you nurtured us, you loved us unconditionally, you taught us how to navigate through life challenges, forthrightness and our strength of character, you taught us how to fight, be ourselves and stand on our own. You shouted at us and cuddled us. Above all, you taught me what love truly is and the beauty of forgiveness.
You were a bundle of inspiration to all around you. Your kind soul, wise counsel and outstretched hands can’t be quantified. Your home was open to everyone, your hospitality made them feel special. You are the most humble, compassionate, understanding family oriented woman I have ever seen. You are so dear and so true. You had an indescribable inner strength. You are a fighter and I know if you could you would have fought death and defeated it. My heart breaks 💔💔💔 My sweet mummy 😭😭😭💔💔💔💔
You owed no man and paid everyone their dues. You were very energetic, highly organised and disciplined. I was not surprised that each group we went for clearance after your death, the reply we got was the same “Mama Ada o n’eji kwanu ugwo (Mama Ada doesn’t owe).
I am saddened by your death, dear mother. You went home without even enjoying the fruit of your labour but I am sure you know that I tried, I gave you EVERYTHING! I gave you the first Pizza you ate; the smile on your face that day. We had plans mummy; we had plans. Who do I share my ideas with now 😭😭.
I remember when I was without a job for some months and opted to start selling gym wear you supported me. Or was it when I was broke and you’d give me your last card. Or deny yourself meat so I could have it 😭😭. But I feel profoundly honoured, blessed and proud that you are my mother. Missing you is a heartache that will never go away but your life will remain a constant reminder that there is no greater way to honour you than to be a better me and uphold the love and peace you lived and died for.
No doubt your parting has left a deep crater but we will fill it with memories of joy, laughter, friendship, kisses, hugs, that we shared. Yes, mum, these things we shall miss very much.
It is important to mention at this point, to anyone who’s reading this piece and whose parents are still alive to do well to take proper care of them by providing them with basic necessities of life. Please, do those things that make them feel happy, loved and appreciated, like a child in the arms of his nursing mother.
For those of us that lost a parent or parents, the best we can do is to fervently pray for them always and seek the means of creating avenues for good deeds and charity works to dedicate the rewards to them.
‘’My Lord and Sustainer! Be kind and have mercy on her as she cherished, nurtured and sustained me in childhood.”
I fervently pray that all you’ve prayed for us during your lifetime continue to follow us until our last breath.
I can’t finish this without appreciating all those that stood with us at the time of our grief. No doubt, your presence, your outpoured prayers and consolations via direct calls, text messages, and on social media was overwhelming, calming, and encouraging. I really can’t thank you enough but I pray to God to reward you abundantly and may He continue to keep us together and forgive our deaths.
I can still hear you scream my name from your window whenever I visited, “Adaaaa Babyyy oyoyoyoo bia makwam”, Nne jili nwayoo. Nne kedu, etc. Chai, this life is just…. . .
Enjoy your deserved peace with the Lord, Ezi Nne m Oma, till we meet again to part no more.
Adieu Nne m oma
Adieu Nne Soldiers
Adieu mummy m
Your daughter and best friend Adaeze Anaekwe (Ada Baby).
I Love you forever and always ❤❤❤❤❤